Meme overflow

[capslocking]

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Comments

[wouldhave]

You would if you could.

[logomachist]

Or you could help.

[wouldhave]

that's what the blowjob is for

[logomachist]

How? It's going to make you care more? Or going to make me care twice as much?

[wouldhave]

[Don't quantify his offer of blowjobs. just accept them. plz.]

Do you feel like you could care twice as much? I doubt there's room for more passion in you.

[logomachist]

Possibly. You certainly could stand to.

[Alas, Grantaire must suffer through his weird version of 'buy me dinner first.']

[wouldhave]

[look he said he's got pizza]

Me? I already feel a great deal of passion about wine, about cat videos and sad movies that are poorly reviewed but stir my heart anyway.

And your dick, but I think we've established that already.

[logomachist]

What, even when you're sober?

[wouldhave]

Don't worry. I try to put it from my mind when you're waxing eloquent on the dire state of the world or doing your best to change things through sheer force of personality.

[logomachist]

I wouldn't have guessed you've ever been sober while I'm speaking.

Why cat videos, by the way?

[wouldhave]

[Apollo, light of R's life, are you seriously asking why cat videos

There is no why. Cat videos just are.]


because I'm sure you were a cat in a former life, and I can't stand to be parted from you when I can't watch you orate in public or private


since it comes to mind that you might not understand sarcasm, that was sarcasm, oh Apollo

[logomachist]

[Because he likes understanding passion, R. It's one of his, like, two things. If cat videos are worth fighting and dying for, he wants to know.]

Enjoy your pizza.

[wouldhave]

Alas! He has decided enough is enough. I'll enjoy what's left of the cold pizza, if you promise the next time you wank you think of blowjobs ;)

[logomachist]

Why? What in the world good will that do you?

[wouldhave]

Absolutely nothing!

[Just don't immediately forget him when he isn't in front of you.]

[logomachist]

Then why would you ask for it?

[wouldhave]

Because I'm drunk, the pizza's cold, and tonight sadly lacks blowjobs. One of us must salvage this situation!

[logomachist]

No one's stopping you from going out and getting one.

[Which is probably the right time to just. turn off his phone but. here he is typing again.]

Why do you only text me when you're drunk?

[wouldhave]

I'm already eating the pizza. It would be sad if I was responsible for both parts.

[He's not answering that second text.]

[logomachist]

[Okay but so.]

Text someone else to come over, then.

Why do you only text me when you're drunk, R?

[wouldhave]

Who says I only text you? Courf and I have great fun punning at each other while we're both drunk off our faces

[logomachist]

Why don't you text me when you're sober?

[wouldhave]

Who says I'm ever sober?

[take the fucking hint, apollo. leave it]

[logomachist]

Do you not even believe in sex enough to take control of your life?

[wouldhave]

[The wine has run out, the pizza is cold, and his mood has soured. Just because you're the embodiment of passion made real doesn't mean you get to pick apart his life whenever you want to without giving anything in return.]

"believe in sex enough" are you fucking high

Sex doesn't fucking change people.